Saturday, March 30, 2013

Love has Come for Me- Confessions from a Type-A Personality

It never ceases to amaze me how God can grab my attention at the most unexpected times. Like when Matt and I were watching America Idol Thursday night (yes, we still watch it) and Colton Dixon performed his song Love Has Come for Me. (You have to listen to it! ...The song starts at the 1:48-minute mark.)

"Love Has Come For Me"

I tell myself that I can do better
Someday I'm gonna get it all together
Who am I fooling?
I am weak and prone to be
The me that I will always be
So what's left to do but surrender?

This is where I end
And this is where You start
And everything I needed
Is everything You are
Love has come for me
Oh, love has come for me

I've never understood but it's amazing
The way you never let the past enslave me
How do you do it?
Love the heart, the part of me
That desperately needs a remedy
I wanna be a life You keep changing

Cause this is where I end
And this is where You start
And everything I needed
Is everything You are
Love has come for me
Oh, love has come for me

And I'll go where You want me to be
And even though I may be broken
I can see Your love has come for me

I'm never gonna get it all together
So, what's left to do but surrender?


Cause this is where I end
And this is where You start
And everything I needed
Is everything You are
Love has come for me
Love has come for me
Yeah, love has come for me
Love has come for me

Man, did those lyrics speak to me. I tend, and by tend I mean almost always try, to control different aspects of my life. When things will happen, how they will happen. I try to hide behind the fact that I'm a planner, (which is a positive quality, right?!) ;) when truly, my planning often has the opposite effect of what a planned person would like- rather than feeling prepared and in control of a situation, I'll feel anxious or frustrated if the smallest detail doesn't turn out how I pictured it in my mind. (Hmm... maybe this confession was a bad idea...) But writing it out actually helps me to see how crazy I am. Because I know that God's plan is a bagillion times better than my own. Yes, a bagillion.

The beauty of it is that God created me to be this oh-so-planned-and-prepared ;) person. He knows me better than I know myself. He knows that this little gift he's given me can also get in the way of what He's trying to do in my life. That's why I love the line that says, "I'm never gonna get it all together, so, what's left to do but surrender?"  This is me. I'm a planner. And it can be a great thing. But my life is the greatest when I surrender my plans to The Plans that I know are way more beautiful than what I can dream up in my own mind. ...A Jesus-Take-The-Wheel kind of epiphany, we'll call it.

It's convicting moments like watching Amercan Idol this that lead me to the cross and remind me of these truths:

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" ~Jeremiah 29:11

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens." ~Ecclesiastes 3:1

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." ~Proverbs 3:5-6

To top off the spiritual American-Idol experience, this is what I read Friday morning in my Jesus Calling devotional:


Gotta love when God can take a TV show and create a much-needed moment like this. (...And now I'm sing Kelly Clarkson's finale song from season one in my head- figures).

If you feel so inclined to make me feel better and comment on how you too try to control the daily events of your life, I'm not stopping you. ;) I will be more than happy to pray for you too when I'm trying my best to surrender each day!

Happy Easter, friends!

11 comments:

  1. I have never met you in person, have yet to share the joy of your sweet smile and tenderness in person, but I can tell you how much I love you!
    I LOVE this post Heather! And it is SO me too! I try to control what He has already planned for me more often than I care to admit.
    Happy Easter friend. Enjoy your time with family. Thinking about you this morning. Will lift you up in prayer.

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  2. This was an excellent post. Thats what I always say too. How amazing it is that the little things can bring out so much thought and clarity. I LOVE the words you read Friday. Couldn't explain my life better. I'll admit, I am a planner. I love to organize, I love lists, I love to know whats happening and if plans change or have to carried out a little different, I get so upset. The fact that I dont like change and that I have a little OCD may also contribute to this :). But, I used to be obsessed with planning when i was younger even more than I am now. I'd plan days in advance and sometimes because I'd over plan I'd get confused. Now that I'm older, I'm realizing that we shouldn't worry about everything in one day. Focus on the things that need to be done. If the thing that you cant seem to stop thinking about was actually meant to happen, it will.

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  3. I have had the "Jesus take the wheel" epiphany myself. :)

    I liked and appreciated your post.

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  4. Typa A personality is exactly me also. I flip out when things stray from the plan and although I wish I weren't like that and have been working on it, I still get this inner agitation and start feeling like "woe is me". But really, my plan wasn't the plan at all, God already had planned what he wanted and knew what was going to happen. I def get stuck in my head a lot. I will always be type A personality which is why we are the people we are and have the successes we have achieved, but trusting that things will work out is the hard part :-)
    So glad we read the same devotionals. Will be fun to see if we post on similar things! Happy Easter girl!
    Adrienne

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  5. How awesome for God to make his presence known you like that! I'm the same with planning; I plan so I can control the end results. I've been learning the hard way, now that I have kids, that life just isn't easier "my way" all the time.

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  6. oh how this post truly spoke to me at this very moment. thank you so much, heather. it is beautiful. we watch american idol and saw colton's performance on thursday...he's so talented. each day i learn more and more how life is funny and God totally has a plan. one day at a time, for sure. :)
    i wish you, matt and you family a beautiful and blessed easter! xoxox
    maria

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  7. I love your confession post. We are so much alike and I have to daily remind myself that I'm not in control. I also get a little help with that from others:) I stopped watching American Idol maybe 5 or 6 years ago girl..thanks for the update. Have a blessed and happy Easter!

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  8. I love your confession post. We are so much alike and I have to daily remind myself that I'm not in control. I also get a little help with that from others:) I stopped watching American Idol maybe 5 or 6 years ago girl..thanks for the update. Have a blessed and happy Easter!

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  9. I love love love this! Thanks for sharing! I just came across your blog and I'm your newest follower :) Would you mind checking out our blog and (if you like) following back via GFC and Bloglovin'? Looking forward to your next post! xx

    sixthtractate.blogspot.com

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  10. Great post! It is so good when God literally stops us in our tracks and let's us know that he has a different...and better...plan for us. When we release our own expectations then we can recieve all that he has for us. Pretty cool when he works through the things we engage ourselves in, like American Idol, and/or the people we interact with. Happy Resurrection Sunday!

    -Karen
    www.yourstylistkaren.com

    -Karen
    www.yourstylistkaren.com

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  11. Heather, what a great post. God can speak to us through any means he deems necessary huh!?! :) And I LOVE me some Jesus Calling, always on point in my life. I found you on the Prowess and Pearls link up. Glad you posted.

    Heather
    http://wonderousblunderous.blogspot.com

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