Love has Come for Me- Confessions from a Type-A Personality

It never ceases to amaze me how God can grab my attention at the most unexpected times. Like when Matt and I were watching America Idol Thursday night (yes, we still watch it) and Colton Dixon performed his song Love Has Come for Me. (You have to listen to it! ...The song starts at the 1:48-minute mark.)

"Love Has Come For Me"

I tell myself that I can do better
Someday I'm gonna get it all together
Who am I fooling?
I am weak and prone to be
The me that I will always be
So what's left to do but surrender?

This is where I end
And this is where You start
And everything I needed
Is everything You are

Love has come for me
Oh, love has come for me

I've never understood but it's amazing
The way you never let the past enslave me
How do you do it?
Love the heart, the part of me
That desperately needs a remedy
I wanna be a life You keep changing

Cause this is where I end
And this is where You start
And everything I needed
Is everything You are
Love has come for me
Oh, love has come for me

And I'll go where You want me to be
And even though I may be broken
I can see Your love has come for me

I'm never gonna get it all together
So, what's left to do but surrender?

Cause this is where I end
And this is where You start
And everything I needed
Is everything You are
Love has come for me
Love has come for me
Yeah, love has come for me
Love has come for me

Man, did those lyrics speak to me. I tend, and by tend I mean almost always try, to control different aspects of my life. When things will happen, how they will happen. I try to hide behind the fact that I'm a planner, (which is a positive quality, right?!) ;) when truly, my planning often has the opposite effect of what a planned person would like- rather than feeling prepared and in control of a situation, I'll feel anxious or frustrated if the smallest detail doesn't turn out how I pictured it in my mind. (Hmm... maybe this confession was a bad idea...) But writing it out actually helps me to see how crazy I am. Because I know that God's plan is a bagillion times better than my own. Yes, a bagillion.

The beauty of it is that God created me to be this oh-so-planned-and-prepared ;) person. He knows me better than I know myself. He knows that this little gift he's given me can also get in the way of what He's trying to do in my life. That's why I love the line that says, "I'm never gonna get it all together, so, what's left to do but surrender?"  This is me. I'm a planner. And it can be a great thing. But my life is the greatest when I surrender my plans to The Plans that I know are way more beautiful than what I can dream up in my own mind. ...A Jesus-Take-The-Wheel kind of epiphany, we'll call it.

It's convicting moments like watching Amercan Idol this that lead me to the cross and remind me of these truths:

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" ~Jeremiah 29:11

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens." ~Ecclesiastes 3:1

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." ~Proverbs 3:5-6

To top off the spiritual American-Idol experience, this is what I read Friday morning in my Jesus Calling devotional:

Gotta love when God can take a TV show and create a much-needed moment like this. (...And now I'm sing Kelly Clarkson's finale song from season one in my head- figures).

If you feel so inclined to make me feel better and comment on how you too try to control the daily events of your life, I'm not stopping you. ;) I will be more than happy to pray for you too when I'm trying my best to surrender each day!

Happy Easter, friends!